The power of decision

Testimony 3 by Jessica

The power of decision

While I was shopping for our son’s birthday party, which was taking place the next day at our house, in the presence of the whole family, I was assailed by negative, discouraging and anxiety-provoking thoughts.

An event supposed to be pleasant

Indeed, having been unwell in recent weeks, my husband had a tendency to use harsh words and I, a little tired, I was no longer able to take the necessary distance, in such a way that each non-benevolent remark got to me and hurt me.

After putting away my groceries at home, I settled into a chair and went to war against my swirling thoughts: “What if he makes disparaging remarks to me in front of the guests… What if I start crying in front of everyone… “.

Allowing myself to be sucked in?

I anticipated a lot of possibilities! In fact, not only was I failing to silence these self-destructive thoughts and not fighting them, but I was actually feeding them! My stress was only increasing. I was sucked down (this is also the reason why I chose the attached image as an illustration of my experience).

It was then that I picked up a book that a friend had given me, called Hope in Difficult Time, by Joyce Meyer. And there, on pages 28 and 29, I read:

“Don’t be afraid! What is fear? Fear is when we expect an unpleasant experience, it is the exact opposite of hope… Fear can steal our joy and ruin our day. Choose to stay happy and let God take care of the rest. Whatever the situation, we can choose the following attitude: I will continue to do what I have to do and enjoy life, regardless of the circumstances, with joy.”

The power of my decision

From then on, I made the decision to put these wonderful tips into practice. I prayed asking God to give me His gaze so that I could see things as they really were and not as they might appear in the light of my imagination or emotions.

The power of prayer

For me, praying is like talking to a very close friend. I approach my God, my Dad, just as I am, with my doubts and my weaknesses of the moment.

In this case I said to my heavenly Father:

“Dad, look at my heart and search it deeply. I’m scared, I anticipate everything bad that could happen, and I fixate on it so much that my thoughts are drowned out by my anxieties and I lose sight of you. It feels like real self-destructing tornadoes. But ENOUGH! I decide now to be happy and I let you do the rest! I make the decision to surrender to you the rest of the day and that of tomorrow. You say in your Word of truth that you cause all things to work together for good to those who love you. And I love you ! Therefore, I can count on You, because You are the same yesterday, today and for eternity. Everything works for my good, heavenly Father.”