Journey through illness

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Journey through illness

with the gentle

presence of God

Testimony of Nicole

Everyone goes through health problems. It happened to me too. This is how I went through the illness.

On my way to the Valais

a region of the Swiss Alps

We had just arrived in the Valais to spend a weekend as a couple when I suddenly experienced severe nausea, dizziness and loss of balance. The headaches intensified as the minutes ticked by. My legs couldn’t even carry me. I was taken to the nearest hospital.

Like a washing machine,

I felt like I was spinning!

My brain was indeed trying to rectify the situation, but the headaches were getting worse the more it tried. It was as if I was pressing a button to make it stop, but to no avail! After hours of unsuccessful attempts, my brain ‘mandated the eye area’ and the result was nystagmus (an involuntary, uncontrolled movement of the eyes from side to side, up and down or in a circle).

The diagnosis

Following various tests, I was diagnosed with an acute vestibular deficit (called acute vestibular neuritis by some doctors).

I was like a rag doll in a hospital bed, in a state of extreme physical weakness. It was painful to move even one arm. My hospital room was plunged into darkness, because any light was aggressive and difficult to bear.

And yet…

During this illness, I experienced moments of intimacy with the Lord, and I’d like to share them with you.

Prepared

without my knowledge

That morning, before leaving for the Valais, I had a moment of recollection in the Bible and decided to keep a few things for the day:

Keep your focus on the Lord

Maintain your inner peace

Keep the faith, against all odds.

The peace of the Lord

These moments of intimacy with the Lord kept me going throughout my illness. As the hours and days ticked by, I stayed the course, remembering my decisions: keep your focus on the Lord, keep your inner peace, keep the faith, against all odds.

A soothing cocoon of love

The Lord’s indescribable peace and gentleness invaded my mind and soul, just as the water at the bottom of the ocean remains calm even when a hurricane is raging on the surface, producing waves 25 metres high! What an incredible contrast!

I felt like I was in a cocoon of divine love. Jesus was so close to me! It was such support to pass through illness with the gentle presence of God.

Moments of intimacy with Jesus

My moments of intimacy with the Lord kept me going.

Of course, it was impossible for me to read. However, the scriptures that I had learnt by heart since I was young, nourished and sustained me. I remembered them and was particularly strengthened greatly by this promise in my heart:

‘My grace is sufficient for you,

for my power is made perfect

in weakness’

2 Corinthians 12:9

The sweet presence of the Lord is so real when we are weak and fragile.

Bear witness

to what you are experiencing!

I even felt that God was asking me to bear witness to this experience and to the contrast between a shipwrecked body and a replenished spirit. And that’s what I did.

What happened next?

After a few days, I was discharged from hospital and had to undergo vestibular rehabilitation for 6 months.

I got better and better though my balance is still fragile, but it is manageable in my day-to-day life.

To you

who are suffering physically

To those of you who are suffering physically, I’d like to express my deepest sympathy. I hope that your closeness to the Lord will enable you to find the strength to get through these very difficult times.

It is good to go through illness

in the company of Jesus.

It is a blessing to have Jesus

by your side when you go through illness.

His promise to never leave nor forsake us is true.

It’s written in Lamentations 3:22-23:

It is through the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed,

because His compassions fail not.

They are new every morning; great is Thy faithfulness.

Nicole